Pilot's Wife

I can't even count the times I have been asked "How do you do it?" And we aren't even 6 months in.  To be honest a small part of me gets irritated when people ask "Where is Dave?" or "He is gone again?"  Yes people.  He is a pilot.  His work is traveling all over the country. 

I had been told this new life would be miserable. I expected this new life to be miserable.  There were several, and I mean several, conversations early on in our marriage about whether or not we should go through with this.  Whether or not we were strong enough to take on this lifestyle.  But we agreed that we could make this work.  Dave is so passionate about his job.  Anyone who has ever talked to him knows that.  It is in his blood.  To do this, it has to be.

 September was our first full month. He was based in MSP and it was, in fact, miserable. We saw him a day or two a week if we were lucky.  On top of that we were paying to have him live in Minneapolis.  Peyton woke up most mornings asking where dad was.  I looked at our life and thought there is no way we can make this work.  Our kids are going to grow up without their dad being there for them physically.  I saw myself raising our kids on my own. I had too many meltdowns to count and I begged him to look into the training department which has a more "normal" schedule. I wanted to call it quits after just one month. 

October was better. Then we found out he would be based in SLC starting November. Our prayers had been answered.  Before we started at SkyWest we heard that it took people several months to several years to be based in Salt Lake, due to the fact of it being a very senior base.  It seemed as though we could not have gotten into the airlines at a better time.  

He left on Saturday night for a 3 day. Before Saturday he was off for 3 weeks and he will be off for the next week. I want to cry tears of joy because I know now this will work for us. I'm falling in love with it. He is home so much more then a "normal" schedule would allow and we are able to spend so much time as a family. I'm not naive in thinking that it will always be ideal or that I will love his schedule every month, but it's working for us. He followed his dream and is making such a good life for our family.

In my short 5 months as a pilots wife, I have already found things the I love about this lifestyle.  Of course there are negatives, and there is with any career I believe.  But here are some things I have grown to love:

Community/Support System/Friends

I have met the most amazing people through this that I wouldn't have if Dave wasn't a pilot.  When we moved down to Arizona, we left behind everything and everyone we had ever known.  It was scary for a girl who had never lived more then 30 minutes from her family!  If it weren't for Dave's job and for those we met through his job it would have been so much harder.  Some of our best friends to this day are those pilot families that we met while we were in Phoenix.  Whenever things get hard, or overwhelming, there is nothing like being able to turn to a community of people who know exactly what you are going through.  I am part of a Facebook group for Skywest Spouses.  I debated on whether or not I should even join in the beginning.  I didn't want to hear about how miserable these wives lives were because their husbands were pilots.  But it is nothing like that.  I have never met any of these women, but I feel like they have my back.  If ever I have a question, need advice or just a listening ear, they are there.  They are so positive about their husbands career and the lifestyle they are living.  They have been such a strength to me during this new adjustment.  You can't talk to people about it who haven't experienced it.  It is a whole different world and I would be lost without my pilot sisters!

Dad Duty

One of the hardest parts of having dad gone is mom being on duty 24/7.  Let me tell you, it is exhausting!  One of my favorite parts of Dave coming home is that he takes over with Peyton!  Since I taken care of everything while he is gone, I REALLY appreciate when he is home to help out with meal time, bath time, bed time . . .all the times of the day!  

Flight Benefits

We love to travel!  And with free flights it makes it that much easier!  In our short 6 months we have gone to California (twice), Washington and Texas. . . for FREE!  Of course standby can be stressful, but when it works out it is amazing.  We will be able to have so many opportunities to see so many different places that we wouldn't have been able to otherwise.

Me Time

Of course I miss him when he is gone, but there is something special about having some me time.  After Peyton is in bed I am able to just have some alone time.  Time to catch up on "my" stuff.  TV shows, movies, books, crafts. . .

Sense of Pride

The sense of pride that swells up in your chest is like falling in love all over again.  That's right.  That's my man.  Flying an airplane!  He has worked so hard to get to where he is today and I am proud to call him mine. I love being able to tell people where he works and what he does.  It is so different and exciting.  It is one of those careers that little kids want to do when they grow up.  He absolutely loves his job and gets so excited to go to work.  How many people can say that?

So if any of you have ever wondered, there ya have it.  We are surviving this new lifestyle and falling in love with it.

A Baby

"If we have faith in Jesus Christ the hardest as well as the easiest times in our lives can be a blessing."
-President Henry B. Eyring

At the end of August we found out that we were pregnant with baby number two.  We were so excited and a little surprised it happened so fast!  I thought the timing was perfect.  Peyton and this baby would be a little over 2 1/2 years apart and a May baby just sounded dreamy.  I was feeling so tired and so nauseous this pregnancy.  It felt different then my pregnancy with Peyton from the beginning.  I got sick really early on and knew I was pregnant even before taking a pregnancy test.  I made an appointment to see my doctor at 12 weeks.  

When I was 11 weeks pregnant I began spotting.  I had spotted with Peyton at 7 weeks and didn't think much of it.  A couple days later I started having more bleeding and called my doctor.  They had me go in for an ultrasound on Thursday October the 15th.  The ultrasound showed no baby.  I was devastated.  The ultrasound tech didn't tell me much and told me that the doctor still wanted to see me at my appointment on Monday, which was originally my 12 week appointment.  They had me have some blood work done that day and told me to come back 2 days later to have some more done to see what my levels did.  

On Friday I got a call from my nurse saying that my numbers from the blood work were really high.  She said without a second number it is not very telling.  This got my hopes up and I thought that maybe we hadn't lost the baby.  I had been reading stories online of this happening all the time and thought that maybe we would see a miracle.  

On Sunday and Monday I was bleeding and began cramping.  By the time we went to our appointment on Monday afternoon, I was pretty sure I was losing the baby.  We went to our appointment and the doctor confirmed that it was not a viable pregnancy. . .I hated hearing those words.  She told us that things though were not adding up.  She said it could have been an early miscarriage and that my body had just not let go of the baby, which is why I was still feeling pregnant.  She said she was also worried about it being a molar pregnancy.  She suggested having a d&c the next day.  We took her advice and found out a couple days later that it was an early miscarriage and not a molar pregnancy.  We were thankful for this.

This has been such a heartbreaking experience.  Through it all I have not been able to get those who have gone through this or dealt with infertility off of my mind.  It is a loss and a heartbreak like no other that I have felt.  So many go through this and so many stay silent.  This was a baby, it was our baby, and I know that someday we will get the opportunity to raise him or her.  I know that miscarriages happen most of the time because there is a problem with the chromosomes that would make it impossible for the fetus to develop normally.  So I have been trying to look at it as a blessing.  That this baby was just too good to come to earth.  It has been a long week.  A very trying week.  It has been emotionally draining to go through this.  I have had a million thoughts going through my head and so many questions that may never be answered.  I know we will get through this and I know that this will make us stronger.  I am thankful for a good husband who has not left my side and for a healthy two year old.  We are so blessed and I am so thankful for a loving Heavenly Father.  I have faith in his timing and know that this happened for a reason.   

"We learn and grow and become stronger as we face and survive the trials through which we must pass." 

- President Thomas S. Monson

Moving Home

"Moving Home" doesn't seem like the right title for this post!  By the end of our desert living adventure, Arizona really felt like home.  I miss our Arizona so much!  Especially since Utah welcomed us home with snow. . .

When we first made the decision to move down to Arizona we were honestly excited for a new adventure and for the opportunities that it would bring.  When we first got there it was so fun and so exciting to explore our new city and see all the sights.  However, very quickly we came to the realization that we were far away from everything we knew and the family we loved.  I began counting down the months until we could move home and reminded myself that it was only temporary.

We had been there for about 6 months when everything changed and we fell in love with our new home.  We had made friends that were more like family, settled into a new routine and the weather cooled off. . .which was a big deal after an Arizona summer.  I stopped counting the months we had left and was almost dreading that our time in Arizona seemed to be going by so fast!

We made the most amazing friends and we were in the most amazing ward.  I know that we were where we were supposed to be.  We were so loved and the people made it so hard to leave.  We will never forget our time there or the people that we met.

Thanks for being so good to us Arizona!

 

SkyWest

It's official!!  Dave just got a job at SkyWest Airlines!  Working for this airline has been our dream and goal for years now and we cannot believe it's finally happening.  I cannot even begin to describe how incredibly proud I am of this husband of mine!  He has worked and studied so hard for this and made his dreams become reality.

So many emotions come with this.  There is of course the excitement and the relief that all of his hard work will be put to good use.  We paid big bucks for his education and ratings so it is a good thing that he will be using them!  He will be doing what he loves and we are now finally where we want to be.  We could not have picked a better time to get into the industry.  They need pilots like crazy right now and because of that there are great things happening in the airline industry.

But there is also the fear of the unknown.  We will have been married for 5 years this September and there are only a handful of nights I can remember not having Dave around.  He is such a hands on husband and dad and does so much for our family.  We have never had our own responsibilities, but share all the responsibilities.  From cleaning to cooking to doing laundry he has been there for it all.  And the one that got up with Peyton when she wasn't sleeping through the night? That was all Dave.  I have been spoiled these past few years and I am really going to have to step it up!  As I'm writing this he is doing the dishes. . .

I like to hear other people's experiences with the airlines, but at the same time I don't.  I feel like it taints my mood and I feel like 99% of what you hear is bad bad bad.  I hear the first year is the toughest. People always say "If you can make it through the first year you have it made!"  Is this because you get used to it or because it actually gets better?  I'd like to believe that I can do anything for a year but I don't want to just get used to my husband never being around.  I came across a blog tonight of an airline pilot's wife.  Dave told me not to read it, but I of course did.  There was of course the negative.  But then the positive really surprised me.  There was the obvious benefit of free flights.  Being able to see the world.  We are all about vacation in this household so you best believe we are looking forward to that!  She also talked about how it makes you more independent.  It makes you stronger.  I will learn to do a lot by myself.  I will learn how to be OK with being alone and being my own person.  And then my favorite. . .when they are home, they are HOME!  They don't have any other distractions.  You have their full attention.  I hope once we are into the thick of all of this that I can remember these things.

Will it suck?  Yes.  Do I think that sometimes I will wish that he had a different job?  Most definitely.  It will take time to adjust.  It will take time to find our new normal.  But I know he will still be there for us like he always has been.  It will just look a little different.

So on to the next adventure!  One we have worked so, so hard for!  I know it will not be easy, but it will be worth it!    

Peyton Paige : 12 Months

Weight : 20 lbs 5 oz

Height : 29 1/2 inches

Clothes : 12 months and 12-18 month

Diapers : Size 3

Our baby turned one!  Everyone always tries to warn you how fast it goes, but I cannot believe how fast the past year went!  She is learning new things everyday and it is so fun to see her learn and grow!  I just love how curious they are at this age.  I always say "this stage is my favorite" and then the next stage comes and that becomes my new favorite!  I just love it all.  We have loved being parents and she has taught us so much.  She is such a sassy little girl and has so much spunk!  She loves music and gets so excited to dance whenever any kind of music is playing.  This includes the music at church!  She loves to clap, dance, give high fives and kisses.  She knows where her tongue and ears are.  She is walking, more like running, and she definitely keeps us on our toes!  It always amazes me how fast she can get away!  My favorite right now is that she loves to hold out her hands as if to say "i don't know" and does it when I ask her where something is.  She loves Katy Perry music videos. . .Roar is her favorite!  She LOVES to be outside which is hard to do here in the desert right now, so I am looking forward to fall and being able to take her outside more often.  She is a water baby and loves the pool and splash pads.  She loves little kids and is quite the social butterfly when it comes to kids.  We were able to go home for Kaela's wedding this month and it was so fun for Peyton to be around family.  She loved it and it made it that much harder to come back to Arizona!  She can say Dada and uh oh.  We are still working on mom. . .She is like a little parrot right now and copies sounds and syllables.  She says things that sound like Peyton and please.  We have started throwing tantrums when we don't get our way. . .already.  She LOVES to read and look at books.  She makes everything so much more fun and it has been so fun having her in our lives!  Happy 1st Birthday baby girl!  We love you so much!

Peyton Paige : 9 Months

Weight : 18 lbs 13 oz

Height : 28 inches 

Clothes : 6-12 month & 9 months

Diapers : Size 3 

Baby girl is looking more like a little girl and less like a baby!  I swear we were just bringing her home from the hospital!  This girl is non stop!  She is definitely keeping us on our toes these days!  She started crawling right before she turned 8 months and has not stopped since!  She is starting to test her balance by letting go of furniture and I am afraid she will be walking soon!  She loves to eat!  She is getting less interested in her bottle and more interested in our food.  And she goes CRAZY for sugar! The other day we walked into Cold Stone and she about lost her mind because she saw the ice cream and wanted it right then!  She has started saying Dadda.  I tried to convince myself that it was just a noise she was making but it was hard to do that when Dave walked through the door and she said Dadda. . .I'm sure Mamma will be her next word right?  She has started waving and knows how to play peek-a-boo.  She loves to read her books and swimming.  She is becoming quite the little water baby!  It is how we are surviving this desert heat!  Church is getting harder and harder. . .she does pretty good the first hour but by the second and third hour she is done!  So if we can't get her to fall asleep it ends up being a very long couple of hours!  She loves to look at pictures and facetime family back home.  She can't quite figure out how they are on the computer screen.  She is going on her first flight this week and I am one nervous Mamma!  Hopefully she is good!

Moving to the Desert

At the end of July we finished building and moved into our first house in Herriman Utah, just 2 weeks before little miss joined our family.  As soon as we felt settled, life decided to change some things up on us.  Davis had graduated and started working for UVU instructing students.  We built a house in Herriman and planned on staying there for about 5 years at least.  Peyton was born happy and healthy and started growing faster then we had ever expected.  Life was so good to us and we were happy with all of the big changes.  Little did we know that the biggest change hadn't come yet.  UVU only allowed their instructors to work part time and so Dave was working at UVU and then working for another company the other time.  Dave wasn't building hours as fast as we would have hoped due to scheduling, weather and other factors which was frustrating at times but we decided that eventually we would get to the airlines.  Right after New Years we found out that Dave was laid off from his 2nd part time job.  At the time we of course felt panic and frustration.  We needed the money that job brought in and we immediately started looking into other options. Dave decided to contact a guy that he trained with at UVU that worked for a company called Transpac Aviation in Phoenix, AZ.  He told Dave that they were hiring and that he should apply.  He also told us that on average instructors build around 1,000 hours a year which is what Dave had left.  To give you an idea, Dave had been with UVU for 8 months and had built around 170 hours.  The decision was easy.  I don't think we ever thought twice about it.  We both felt that it was the right decision from the beginning.  We applied and Dave had a phone interview with the company in January.  They told him that they would like to meet with him in person and we came down to Phoenix in February.  He found out a week later that he got the job!  It was so exciting and so stressful all at the same time!  Here we had this brand new house that we now had to figure out what to do with.  We had a month to get everything taken care of and be down to Arizona.  The thing I struggled with the most, and still do, is taking little miss away from cousins, uncles, aunts and grandparents.  I hated that we had to do that in order for this to happen.  As it always does, things fell into place.  We were able to get the place in Phoenix that we wanted.  We were able to rent out our house.  And thanks to all our family and friends we were able to get everything packed up and moved down to Phoenix just in time for Dave to start at Transpac.  It is such a weird thing being away from home.  I went to UVU and lived in Orem Utah while I was going to college which was 30 minutes from home.  I think the longest I have gone without seeing my family is 2 weeks maybe?  I am a homebody and I love being around family!  I told Dave that he was to never move me outside of Utah.  I have never had any desire to leave Utah or my family.  For some reason I have felt so excited about moving to Phoenix this entire time.  I was never dreading it or angry that we had to leave.  I felt sad that we had to move away from family, but I was OK with it.  My family helped us move down here and I took them to the airport yesterday.  That was tough saying goodbye but I knew that it would be OK.  I don't know if it is because I know that once Dave is finished with his hours that we will move back to Utah or if because I know this will be such a huge growing experience for me and so good for our little family but I am so excited for this amazing opportunity that we have been given!  I know that I will get homesick and that I will miss the holidays and family parties but I know that it will all be worth it.  It will be such a fun little adventure for us and I know I will learn so much from it.  I am so glad to have the technology that we do and that there is social media, texting, skype to help keep in touch with family and friends.  I am also so thankful for the church.  It is so reassuring to know you will have that family and be able to meet people through the ward.  It helps make moving to a place where you don't know anyone so much easier because you know you will have your ward family that you can turn to and rely on.  I know we will miss everyone like crazy and I know they will miss us too . . . mostly Peyton. . . but we are so excited for this next adventure!